Found Footage 3D (2016)

After spending so much time lost in the classics, I figured it was time to return to the present for my next review. That film is the 2016 entry Found Footage 3D that I found on Shudder.

Plot/ A group of filmmakers sets out to make the first 3D found footage horror movie, but find themselves IN a found footage horror movie when the evil entity from their film escapes into their behind-the-scenes footage.

This is one that I had never heard of and knew nothing about going into it. Unfortunately, I wish that I had an idea of what was in store. I have to admit that I enjoyed it more than most found footage films, although it does (in an attempted non-serious way) fall into many of the same traps that plague the subgenre. The storyline and premise are interesting (albeit almost predictable), as the attempt to spoof the found footage genre is somewhat original. The characterizations, dialog, and some of the gore does make it a better watch than most. Unfortunately, the satire only goes so far before the movie falls into the same issues that they are making fun. While I am sure that was intentional, it could have subtly gone that route instead of falling headfirst back into them. Couple that with some uneven pacing and the unnecessary use of 3D and you have a movie that never quite reaches its full potential. In the end, the idea and set-up were there with this one; it just misses the mark and falls into the jumbled subgenre with many other found footage entries that suffer from the same flaws. Sure, it isn’t terrible, but it could have been something that was a much more memorable experience.

Necrophobia 3D (2014)

Sometimes when I have to work late at the institute, I lose interest in finding something to watch. That was not the case tonight, as I decided to check out something different after an episode of Charmed. In the end, I settled on the 2014 supernatural entry Necrophobia (AKA Necrophobia 3D).

Plot/ Dante is a tailor who after losing his twin brother to death became phobic which prevents him from being in contact with death. Whenever he is in front of a dead body, he experiences a creepy feeling that makes him lose his mind.

Having twins, it is always fun to find creepy movies about or involving twins. While this movie may not be super creepy, it is definitely strange and has a weird disjointed feel to it. There were some solid parts to the movie (even if it lacked subtitles) including some decent performances, an odd premise, and some dark atmospheric moments early on. Unfortunately, the weirdness and tension that drew me in early on gave way to a tremendous amount of confusion the longer the movie progressed. It seemed like the entire movie was stuck in a strange loop. In the end, I did like some of the strange happenings, but felt disconnected by the repeating storyline. The movie is an interesting experiment, but it felt like the filmmakers were trying too hard to create something strange and surreal. It is great for a background while writing, but other than that it offers very little in entertainment value.

Paranormal Activity: The Ghost Dimension (2015)

Today was a rough day, as something that I had hoped for did not quite fall into place, and coming to terms with that has not been easy. In time, I am sure I will let everything set in, but it may take some time to fully grasp. Because of this, I wanted something mindless to help pass my evening, and what could be better for mindless entertainment than Paranormal Activity: The Ghost Dimension from 2015.

Plot/ Using a special camera that can see spirits, a family must protect their daughter from an evil entity with a sinister plan.

I knew I was taking a risk by watching this one, as honestly, I have not been one of the biggest fans of the series. Unfortunately, I am a sucker and seceded to give it a shot, and just like last night, I should have gone in a different direction. This may be hard to believe, but this one may be the worst film in the franchise, and actually did not feel like it belonged with the others. The performances are uneven, the storyline and scripting predictable and somewhat clichéd, and there are truly no scares what so ever. In fact, there is nothing memorable at all in this film, and it definitely felt as though it was forced. In the end, there is nothing worth watching and this film, and you should stay away. We can all just hope that this was indeed the final entry in the franchise; it has to end!

Argento's Dracula (2012)

Last night I was a bit disappointed with my movie selection. While the case sounded interesting, it did not in any way live up to the description. For tonight, I was able to pick up one that I know will have some schlock moments, the 2012 Dario Argento 3D adaptation of the Bram Stoker classic, Dracula.

Plot/ It has been 400 years since Count Dracula's beloved Dolingen De Gratz passed away, leaving the immortal bloodsucker forever abandoned. But when he discovers that local newlywed Mina Harker bears a striking resemblance, Dracula embarks on a bloody quest to reunite with his long lost love and live forever with her in hellish immortality. Only the arrival of vampire expert Abraham Van Helsing can put an end to the unholy plan.

Dario Argento's Dracula is an interesting watch for many different reasons. While, I am not sure exactly what direction the film was intended to take, it did have some entertaining moments. Almost an homage to the classic exploitation flicks of the 1970s, this one feels like it is better suited for time. This is far from Argento's best, although it does boat a sexy edge, some decent gore and an awesome soundtrack. Unfortunately, between the horrible CGI, the choppy editing, uneven performances, and slow pacing, this one leaves a lot to be desired. In the end, this unneeded adaptation of Dracula does have some fun moments that did remind me of my youth, but those are nowhere near enough for me to go out and recommend this one to everyone. Sure, there are worse versions out there, but that is expected with a classic tale. Unless you are a serious Argento fan, it may be better to just stay clear.

Silent Hill: Revelation 3D (2012)

After entering the world of Silent Hill, the daughters were amazed at the dark atmosphere in the original. As Halloween draws closer, it is becoming easier to create some scares and I decided to help force some small fears by pushing the heavy atmosphere and continuing a winding road into Silent Hill. After the original, it was time for Silent Hill: Revelation 3D (2012).

Plot/ When her father disappears, Heather Mason is drawn into a strange and terrifying alternate reality that holds answers to the horrific nightmares that have plagued her since childhood.

Sequels are always difficult to judge, as they can almost never live up to the expectations set by the original. That is definitely the case here, as even though there are some positives with it, it in no way lives up to the original. There was a lot to like; the acting was decent, the creatures interesting, and the storyline stayed true to the original ideas. Sure, the pacing was off, there were too many jump scares and the characterization was non-existent, but still it is nowhere near enough to totally sink this. In the end, this one could not generate the same atmosphere that made the original film and the video game awesome and it almost felt rushed. Sure, this one is not for everyone, as it does have some violence and gore, but it is entertaining. If you have not seen it, this one is not the original Silent Hill, but it is decent attempt at a sequel.

Texas Chainsaw 3D (2013)

After spending some time out and about, it was nice to be able to watch some movies late last week before starting vacation. Of course, it would have been better if I would have grabbed something that was more worth my while. My review for the evening is the disappointing Texas Chainsaw 3D.

Plot/ A young woman travels to Texas to collect an inheritance; little does she know that an encounter with a chainsaw-wielding killer is part of the reward.

I really did not expect much from this one, as the Texas Chainsaw train left the station long ago. Watching the original as a teen in the late 1970s / early 1980s, it holds a special place in my heart. Of course, that was my favorite part of this one, as the opening sequence drew me in. Unfortunately, it seemed to spiral down from there. The acting was so-so, the cgi/3d effects seemed forced and the storyline was off. More importantly, it lacked atmosphere and actually came across with more comedic moments than scares. In the end, this was one I could have done without as it did nothing but appear to take the name of a classic and drag it further down the abyss. Stay away and watch the original instead. 

Piranha 3DD (2012)

 

 

After watching Dark Shadows last night, I decided to keep the movie momentum going with another flick from 2012. Of course, I knew going in that there was no way this one could even come close to that Tim Burton entry, but hey, sometimes everyone suffers a little. My late night selection last night was the little publicized (for a reason) Piranha 3DD.

 

 

Plot/ After the events at Lake Victoria, the pre-historic school of bloodthirsty piranhas make their way into a newly opened water park.

 

 

Honestly, before even popping this into the DVD player, I knew what to expect. No, I had not read a review, I could just tell that what I was about to watch was going to be miserable. To be fair, I had hoped that there would be enough campy fun for me to overlook the flaws that I knew would permeate through the entire flick. Unfortunately, I could not even get that. This has to be one of the worst sequels in history. The acting is bad (except for a couple cameos, which are decently funny), the plot makes little sense, and it really offered very little in originality. There was some gore, some kills, and some hot chicks, but that is about it. In the end, this flick was truly one of the most terrible sequels I have watched and feel dumber for have spent time with this on my television. Honestly, avoid this at all cost!

 

 

Hidden (2011)

After watching the lovably Flash Gordon, it was time to venture back to Family Video for a few flicks to keep my weekend lively. I needed it, especially after suffering through another lost day at the lake without a bite. My first selection for the weekend was Hidden from 2011.

Plot/ Scientist Susan Carter is researching the rehabilitation of addicts using an experimental drug in her rehab center. After her death, her idle son Brian Carter is forced by his friend Simon to travel to the real state that he had inherited. Brian and Simon travel with five other friends to the spot and they find that the center is actually an ancient monastery and they have to spend the night.

I watched this one on DVD so I did not see the 3D in it, but can only imagine that the full glory of 3D would not have been able to save it either. This is a bad film with a very clichéd storyline, subpar acting, worse scripting and no gore. Yes, there was a glimmer of originality, but even that was overrun by the cliché. Sure, the flying insects may have looked cool in 3D, but in the end, I really cannot recommend this flick in any way. Stay far away!

Shark Night 3D (2011)

After hanging out and watching Contagion the other night, I decided to watch something very different for my next review. While I picked up a couple of things for my viewing, unfortunately, I had to watch something a little tamer with the daughters around. My selection, Shark Night 3D (it is only PG-13).

Plot/ A weekend at a lake house in the Louisiana Gulf turns into a nightmare for seven vacationers as they are subjected to shark attacks.

When watching the previews for this one, I got the feeling that I had already watched all of the good moments, and ironically, I was right (glad I waited until it was on DVD to watch it). To start, I was a bit depressed by the PG-13 rating, and after watching it, that disappointment was justified. There was really no blood other than the stuff that colored the water when someone was pulled underneath, no gore to mention and the dialogue was a train wreck. Honestly, this was just like something I would catch on the Sci-Fi channel, complete with the cheesy shark graphics.  There were some good point in this, and in fact, the storyline had some potential and actually a bit of originality. Unfortunately, all of that was lost between the bad effects and numerous flaws in the production. In the end, if you love Sci-Fi Channel originals, you may enjoy this one. If not, stay away.

The Final Destination (2009)

After watching the dark trip into the mind of serial killer John Wayne Gacy, I decided to venture into something different with some 3D action. My selection for the late night was The Final Destination from 2009.

Plot/ After a young man's premonition of a deadly race-car crash helps saves the lives of his peers, Death sets out to collect those who evaded their end.

This 3D horror sequel definitely took its 3D billing seriously. Hell, even in 2D, you can see the 3D design with everything.  However, that may be the best part of the movie, as the acting is so-so, the storyline cliché and at 80 minutes it never truly dives into the discussions of death that made the other movies in the franchise at least interesting. In the end, yes, the pacing is good, some of the effects are decent and there are even a few interesting deaths, but that is nowhere near enough to make it a good flick. Sure, it is somewhat entertaining, but unless you are a serious fan of this horror franchise, I would recommend you stay away (I am sure you can find something more interesting).

Saw 3D: The Final Chapter (2010)

I will admit that next to Jason and the Friday the 13th franchise, Jigsaw and the Saw come in a close second. Honestly, in some ways, they are even better. After all, they do provide inspirational quotes and positive thoughts to everyone involved. I ask you, what is the main theme? To live or die, the choice is yours, is what always comes to mind when I think of the movies. How could you get more positive than that? With those thoughts in mind, I decided to start my Saw reviews with the last installment tonight Saw 3D: The Final Chapter.

Plot/ As a deadly battle rages over Jigsaw's brutal legacy, a group of Jigsaw survivors gathers to seek the support of self-help guru and fellow survivor Bobby Dagen, a man whose own dark secrets unleash a new wave of terror.

I remember the uproar when this came out about how it wasn’t close to what it could have (should have) been, and I agree that the film definitely feels rushed. However, the pacing, gore and even storyline work well within these confines and produces an entertaining little flick. The acting is uneven, and even some of the traps become laughable or over-played, but that does not ruin the flick. Honestly, I was saddened to see the franchise come to an end, but that end was well overdue. This groundbreaking franchise opened a lot of eyes, and created such a stir that it deserved a better ending. While far from the best sequel in the series, I did not find it the worst and actually enjoyed quite a bit of it. In the end, I think Saw fans should watch it just to see how some of the storyline comes together, it may not be the perfect send-off, but there are some interesting elements that answered a lot of questions.