Lizzie (2013)

Now I am all for low budget cinema, and I believe that quality films can be made on any budget. Of course, some disappointing films also come from that same cloth, so it is a challenge to continually watch them. In many ways, tonight’s selection, Lizzie (2013) fit into that realm.

Plot/ Lizzie Allen suffers from an extreme case of childhood amnesia which not only lays dark her childhood memories but also her relationships. As she begins to settle to a new house, she starts to get a glimpse of her childhood memories along with clues as to what really happened in the Borden household in 1892.

So, my streak of decent horror flicks came to an abrupt end tonight. This low budget entry had a decent idea, but in no way lived up to that on the screen. The acting was stale, the cinematography so-so and the overall storyline was disconnected and never developed any type of atmosphere. Honestly, there is nothing here to wrap your head around; it was quite disappointing. In the end, this flick really bored me and left me frustrated. Yes, the premise was decent, but there was nothing there to pull it together. Stay away! 

House of 1000 Corpses (2003)

After kicking back with the rage filled zombies and spending most of Sunday at the softball field, it was time to find something to watch. With my mind still full of the visual experience that was Lords of Salem, I decided to continue down the Rob Zombie spiral with the 2003 entry House of 1000 Corpses.

Plot/ Two teenage couples traveling across the backwoods of Texas searching for urban legends of murder end up as prisoners of a bizarre and sadistic backwater family of serial killers.

Having watched Lords of Salem over the weekend, I ended up being in a Rob Zombie mood. Zombie is definitely a polarizing figure in horror, some hate him and some love him. Personally, I love what he has created on the screen and it all started with this flick. While this was not the typical movie of the day, it definitely struck a cord with fans of exploitation horror of the 1970s. The cinematography in this film is awesome, as the art house influences, and divergent characteristics really work. More importantly, this created a world that true horror fans would understand and enjoy full of blood, effects and a disturbing storyline. Yes, it may lack some character depth and the acting is not perfect, but those were the same problems that haunted most of the exploitation craze in the 1970s. In the end, this movie does more than pay homage to some horror classics; it opened the door for many of the more twisted entries of the past decade. If you have not watched it, check it out!

The Demented (2013)

Zombies are always great fun, especially when you get into the debate on whether they should be the slow, Romero mythos version or the 28 Days later, rage infused creatures. For me, I definitely fall on the Romero side, but really zombies are just awesome! Last night, I decided to kick back with some low budget rage infused zombies in the 2013 entry, The Demented.  

Plot/ Six college friends unite for a weekend getaway where they find themselves fighting for their lives after a terrorist attack turns the local residents into rage infused zombies.

After watching The Lords of Salem Friday night, my Saturday watching was destined to suffer and it did. The demented is not a terrible flick by any means, in fact, it had a lot going for it with a decent cast, some solid acting and an interesting premise. Unfortunately, it also did not offer anything new to the rage zombie genre. Yes, it did have some tense moments and some decent chases, but it was on such a small scale that it could not drive the film. To top it off, the low budget flick featured almost zero gore and most of the make-up effects did nothing to create an atmospheric zombie. The real killer was the ending can you say head scratcher? All in all, this was not a terrible low budget zombie flick, but it was not great either. For me, it was a bit too tame and could have went so much further. 

The Lords of Salem (2012)

Friday the 13th is always a great day to watch horror flicks. While I usually try to watch some type of slasher, likely featuring Jason Voorhees or another classic serial killer, I decided to change things up this week. One reason is my frustration with the brakes on my car, which decided to go out during my 40-mile drive home, what fun! After the stressful drive, I decided to venture into something new that I have not watched yet, the 2012 Rob Zombie flick The Lords of Salem!

Plot/ Heidi, a radio DJ, is sent a box containing a record -- a "gift from the Lords." The sounds within the grooves trigger flashbacks of her town's violent past. Is Heidi going mad, or are the Lords back to take revenge on Salem, Massachusetts?

This movie will be a very polarizing flick for horror fans. Written and directed by Rob Zombie, this may be one of the most incoherent and psychedelic flicks I have seen in some time. Yet, even with the non-linear structure, there is so much to love about this tremendously visual flick.  The storyline, the soundtrack, the cast, the artistic interpretation; really everything worked. Yes, there was a lack of detailed characterization and some of the back-story was only touched on, but that does not matter. Unfortunately, this one will definitely not be for everyone, as the combination of Devil-worshiping witchcraft and art-house feel will turn some off, especially if they are searching for a gorefest. In the end, I feel this one is a movie that must be seen as it is not the typical flick created by Zombie. In fact, next to The Devils Rejects, this may be his best work. That being said, it is also understandable for people, even some Rob Zombie fans, to hate this flick; it is definitely an independent film that will divide opinions.  

Triskaidekaphobia - For Friday the 13th

Triskaidekaphobia

Such a dark day in the world
Leaders defiled
The protectors destroyed in your name
Not by the masses that follow
But, from the hypocrisy of medieval royalty
For what - your secrets?
Jealousy? Fear?
Maybe it was just their shame from following the false prophet
The sinner who hid behind his disciples
And worse, women and children
Spouting lies of redemption
Preaching abstinence instead of indulgence
Creating turmoil in the perfect world
.. ..

Through it all, you stood tall
These destroyers of forged faith were blind
Failing to harness the power of your minions
By creating a day of homage of their transgressions
They granted you eternal life
History crying tears of truths in your name
You will never be forgotten
You Baphomet, will live forever
Like the Templar’s, your followers will bleed for you
Carrying on the traditions past down by the strong
Your enigma, a mystery to most
A companion to some
A day of fear to the meek
That day is today, Friday the 13^th
.. ..

Hellraiser (1987)

Every now and then, I enjoy taking a trip back to my teenage years to re-watch some of the flicks that shaped my interest in horror, both in literature and on the big screen. While I intended to look deeper at the Friday the 13th franchise this week, I could not pass up the fact that the Clive Barker classic Hellraiser debuted in the UK today in 1987. Couple that with the fact that Barker has finally finished the much anticipated Scarlet Gospels and my interest to visit Pinhead was complete.

Plot/ An unfaithful wife encounters the zombie of her dead lover, who's being chased by demons after he escaped from their sado-masochistic Hell.

Growing up, I was a huge fan of Edgar Allan Poe and H.P. Lovecraft and I spent most of my teenage years in the 1980s searching for an author that could take me on a journey into some of the dark depths that those two masters could. That search ended when I saw Hellraiser and discovered Clive Barker. In the era of the slasher, this was a cinematic trip that challenged ones mind. Complete with a tremendous mix of gore, storyline and atmosphere, this was so much more than the typical horror of the decade. Yes, some of the characterizations were off and the acting was so-so, but that was a small flaw in a horror masterpiece. In the end, Hellraiser was a groundbreaking horror flick that influenced a generation and opened my eyes to horror maestro Clive Barker. If you have not see this one, shame on you. It is a must for every horror fan. 

8MM (1999)

Having the day to watch one of the daughters who was home sick, I decided to check out some flicks that have been piling up on me. While I was going to focus on Friday the 13th and the franchise this week, I had to take a break from it. With that decision in hand, I went toward a thriller, the 1999 flick 8MM.

Plot/ A private investigator is hired to discover if a "snuff film" is authentic or not.

It had been a while since I had watched this flick. However, after a conversation with a computer wiz I know about the depths and levels of unseen internet, I decided to watch it again. This is one of the better thrillers I have seen and has enough suspense to draw you in. The acting is solid, the atmosphere tense, and there is a realism that makes it even more dark and disturbing. Sure, some of the characters are cliché and there are some holes in the storyline, but those are easily overlooked. In the end, this is an awesome flick that must be watched. Yes, it is not for everyone as the premise is unsettling and real. If you have not watched it and get a chance, check it out!

Friday the 13th (2009)

What a miserable evening I had as my laptop crashed and scrambled to get the desktop unit back into working order. Fortunately, I still have one to fall back on until I can get a new laptop. Luckily, while that was taking place, I was able to flip between the Pirates game and the 2009 remake of Friday the 13th. 

Plot/ A group of young adults discover a boarded up Camp Crystal Lake, where they soon encounter Jason Voorhees and his deadly intentions. 

As I have said many times, the Hollywood trend of remaking / rebooting classic horror flicks drives me insane. Where is the creativity? With this flick, I am torn. Yes, it is nowhere near the original classic Friday the 13th, but it is also much better than some of the crap that littered the end of the franchises original run (Jason Takes Manhattan). With every reboot, some of the changes are a bit too much, and that is the case with this one. Jason is excessively athletic in this one, and may diverge from his character a bit too much. The acting is typical, the grainy cinematography takes away for the gore and there is something lacking from the original classics in the series. In the end, it is not terrible, but it is not anywhere near the 1980 classic. Sure, you can select worse flicks from the franchise, but this one would be hard-pressed to rise past the middle of the pack.

Freddy vs. Jason (2003)

I often go through months without looking at a calendar. However, when a month has a Friday the 13th in it, it is hard not to count down. I love that day, one because I am somewhat superstitious, but because there is always a push made to watch some of the greatest slasher flicks of all time, the Friday the 13th franchise and Jason Voorhees. Those movies were my favorite growing up and continue to be a source of enjoyment. My movie selection to kick off the week is Freddy vs. Jason from 2003.

Plot/ Freddy Krueger and Jason Voorhees return to terrorize the teenage population. Except this time, they are out to get each other, too.

  

OK, let me start by saying, I remember watching this at the drive-in when this came out, what a blast that was. Movies like this, with their lore entrenched in horror history should be seen in exactly that manner. While there are some flaws, this one is a treat. The were so many moments that took you back into the heyday of each franchise, making it an entertaining slasher that paid homage to some incredible works. This movie did have a strange context, and some head scratching moments in the storyline.  Sure, the acting is hit and miss, but, the visuals are awesome and the open ended ending was perfect for this one. Honestly, it was just an entertaining tribute and mindless battle between two icons of horror cinema. If you have not seen it, check it out!

Horsemen (2009)

With the last movie that I watched being Sharknado, I decided I had to find something a touch more serious to watch. This was a bit of a challenge, as I spent most of my Friday night at the best high school football game I have seen in Fayette County in a long time. On top of that, my daughters’ band rocked halftime! After knocking out my Steelers 101 piece and relaxing, I decided upon the 2009 mystery Horsemen.

Plot/ Aidan Breslin is a bitter detective emotionally distanced from his two young sons following the untimely death of his devoted wife. While investigating a series of murders of rare violence, he discovers a terrifying link between a chain of murders and the Biblical prophecies concerning the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse: War, Famine, Pestilence, and Death.

When I saw this, the premise sounded interesting and for the most part, it was somewhat interesting. However, while there were some interesting moments, it was predictable and rather cliché. The storyline never developed as much as it could and the characterization lacked depth, something that could have added a lot to the flick. The editing was disjointed and much of acting felt stale. There were some visuals that were good, and the Book of Revelations sub-text is always enjoyable, but there was really nothing in here that made it standout. In the end, it is not the worse flick in the genre, but it is really not worth watching.  

Sharknado (2013)

After a couple days of quiet, I decided to see what I had sitting in my queue to watch. While I had a variety to choose from, and could have dove into some Sci-Fi, or a classic slasher, I decided that I needed something a touch more laughable. My selection for the evening is the ultra-hyped SyFy Channel cheesefest Sharknado from 2013.

Plot/ When a freak hurricane swamps Los Angeles, nature's deadliest killer rules sea, land, and air as thousands of sharks terrorize the waterlogged populace.

After putting this off for some time now knowing this would be a train wreck, I decided that it was time to see what all the hype was about. Now I know and am glad I finally broke down to watch this schlockfest. This is beyond B-Movie camp, this is beyond ludicrous, yet, it definitely falls in the so back it is good category. Cinematically, it is horrid. It is incoherent, the storyline is crazy, the dialogue is non-existent and the CGI makes the reptile creature features appear to be Oscar worthy. All that being said, this has to be one of the most entertaining and laughable SyFy Creature Features that has crossed the screen in some time. If you have not seen this yet, check it out! It is a train wreck that is worth watching.

Jacob (2011)

I have been spending some time this holiday weekend with the family and catching up on some horror flicks we grabbed at Family Video the other day. Tonight as I sit here, I cannot believe the weather; as it looks like the UFOs from Independence Day are overhead in the lightning and clouds, it is crazy. However, that weather really did nothing to enhance this latest flick, from 2011, Jacob.

Plot/ Lonely and disturbed Jacob Kell loved his little sister more than anything on earth. When tragedy strikes, Jacob retaliates the only way he knows how - and anyone who crosses his path will know there is no limit to his brutal vengeance.

It is not often that I am left so torn about a movie, but this one did just that. In watching it, there was some good and some bad, something most movies have. Honestly, the bad, may actually outweigh the good, a common trait of low budget indie flicks. However, there was something here that I just cannot place. On the good, there was a lot of gore, and some of the storyline seemed layered. Unfortunately, the acting was uneven, the dialogue and editing all over the place, the pacing was off and the back-story, while there, never did enough to create full characters. In the end, I was somewhat entertained, but feel like there was so much more that could have come from this movie as it had potential. Of course, it could have helped if the storyline was at least coherent, allowing some of the back-story to rise. I have seen far worse flicks lately. Watch at your own risk. Bottom of Form

The Cloth (2013)

I am all for low budget or no budget horror. Yet, there are times when these movies cross my screen that I somewhat regret my desire to watch them. All I can do is hope that some of my selections do not fall into that category. With this being the weekend of the Pilgrimage, a religious flick would have to be worked into the viewing. My selection to fill that void, the 2013 exorcism flick, The Cloth.

Plot/ A godless man is recruited by a secret organization who works to combat demonic possessions in order to prepare a new generation in the battle against evil forces.

There really is not much to say about this one, other than stay away. Yes, this is a low budget endeavor, and it has many of the typical flaws, but it also lacks some of the intelligence factors of other low budget flicks. The dialogue and scripting is juvenile, the acting uneven, and the plot makes little to no sense and is incoherent at best. On top of that, the CGI effects that are used make even SyFy Channel cheese look like top-notch cinematography and effects; honestly, this is some of the worst CGI I have seen. In the end, this one is not worth wasting time on it, there are much better options available.